Over the past few weeks several significant events have transpired in my life. Some being rather painful and difficult, others quite beautiful and auspicious, they have all caused me to step back and think about why I do the things that I do. Why? How do my routine activities indicate what I believe to be my life’s purpose on this planet? Am I moving daily in the direction of my heart’s deepest longing? These are big questions which yield answers leading to some what lofty notions.
Clearly I did not choose the path of artist and yoga teacher for its lucrative financial benefits. By many people’s standards I am broke, living pay check to pay check with no health insurance, no long term savings plan, and continuing to refuse to surrender to a “safe” 9-5 job with benefits. But for some reason I don’t feel poor. In many ways I feel incredibly rich and blessed. There are many things I have for which to be infinitely grateful. I am also scared. Confronted with seemingly insurmountable obstacles, I am totally terrified! And yet I have seen how life can unfold in unexpected and beautiful ways when you least expect it. So I trust. Then I am filled with a deep joy and enthusiasm for life, which allow me to face my fears on a daily basis.
When we choose to follow our hearts the stakes are the highest. We suddenly realize if we fail we cannot tell ourselves “well I did not really want to do that anyway” because we do! We want it more than anything. So I align my goals and desires with the highest. There is something much bigger than my individual ego working here. Suddenly I realize that it is the same energy that operates all of reality that moves my hands, beats my heart, and thinks my thoughts. Then a great wave of enthusiasm and creativity arises in me and propels me forward. Fear is still there, but grounded in my own true Self I do not waiver.